African Diary of Love: Part 5
Posted by Kathleen W on July 18, 2014
CA, an active participant in Linda Dillon’s webinar series, The New You, finds letting go of resistance, surrendering to the Wave, a transformative experience.
Lately, I’ve been stuck with a sense of old energies and thought it best to be still and quiet. I hit a bit of rough terrain that feels relentless, lasting so long that I came to the conclusion that something was up. This old energy was not “the usual” that I’ve been clearing from day to day.
This was much bigger, somewhat like a transformation – not something I’m familiar with. This is not a road I’ve travelled on; I’ve not experienced these conditions before so I’ve been trying to decide whether I’m ok or absolutely scared to death!
When I committed to playing in the Waves and posting on a regular basis on Linda Dillon’s New You Webinar Forum, it was all about feeling the Love, being the Love and spreading the Love. It was the most incredible experience carrying this beautiful energy and sharing it with all I bumped into along the way. Now I’m at the stage of the journey I’m calling “The Salt Water Detox.”
Much like a detox, it’s not really pleasant. When clearing my system, I can feel rather unwell on a physical level and even worse on an energetic level. As I lie on my bed with tears streaming, I desperately try to convince myself that this really is part of the Plan; that it’s ok, it’s really ok and I’m handling it…. that I’m a woman in control, I can do this, this is fun………… in fact, yeah, I’m having fun, that’s exactly what it is – fun! As I let out a hysterical whimper, cuddling my teddy bear, I reassure myself that I’ve got this………… then I say, “No, no you haven’t girl, not even close…. ”
True to human form, I do everything in my power to resist, to deny surrendering.
I continue to trawl through my days like my life depends on it. I meditate for as many hours as possible, even though there is absolutely no fairy dust left inside! Eventually I give up. Trying to meditate and breathe through my nose is more challenging than achieving world peace! Blowing snot bubbles whilst trying to communicate with the Council of Love is extremely distracting for me and I’m sure for them – sorry guys! I give up, finally a roar and cheer from the Heavens above, “She’s letting us in – hoorah!!!!”
So what’s it all about? I have a theory…………
The whole concept of this journey, this experience is to become “The New You”. The Tsunami is a gift from the Mother giving us the opportunity and the tool to create our beautiful Nova Earth but just as important — our beautiful Nova Selves.
As the Waves crash through me, washing away all the debris, all the junk from eons that I’ve insisted on carrying…….. I perceive it going, going, gone!! I am cleaning away the “old me” just like a “close-out sale” — everything’s got to go! I feel many parts of me that I knew and clung to washing away.
I feel like I’ve been invaded by the bailiffs; they’ve stormed my home, picked up everything that resembles me that I “think” holds some value. I watch them pick up items that I “think” I cannot function without, items that define me. I chase them out the door. “Hey! I need that! I can’t live my life without that, bring it back!!!” Panic and fear overcome me as I see “me” fly out the door.
Feeling exposed and vulnerable, a calmness washes over me then I start to perceive a little differently. What’s the worst thing that could happen if I were to sit here in my home, on the floor, nothing around me to show who I am? I may feel a little lost for a while but what would be the next step? I would go out there and start to bring new things into my home, redesign, rebuild a new home……… a New Me! Ah ha! A NEW YOU! Ok, now I think I’m getting it!
Being an Exercise Specialist I’m always in the gym, training my body and other bodies. In the past I would NEVER miss a day of exercise for fear of gaining 10 kg’s overnight! For two weeks now I haven’t done any training and there’s still no sign of me wanting to.
To add to the irony of it all, I’ve lost weight! Can you believe it!? All those hours in the gym and now I’m only just learning that less is more – duh?! By loosening my grip on life, I’m able to obtain what I want, whatever that might be.
I’m usually quite a busy little bee! If I’m not training my clients, I’m studying a course or exercising and certainly writing about the Tsunami! Week by week as my life started to dismantle in the Wave, I freaked out with the seeming disappearance of key elements of myself with my very safety feeling in jeopardy.
I worked hard to reinstall what had fallen away but each day the Wave crashed my supporting walls with more and more force.
One thing I’ve learned is that the Universe will always win but that doesn’t stop me from putting up my fists and giving it a good “go” back. I imagine Mother Mary lovingly looking down at me whilst rolling her eyes and stroking my head, allowing me to carry on with my hell-bent antics!
After a while, exhaustion sets in and true to form I get sick. I bring on the flu; I’m then rendered useless and that’s when I start listening – I’m tough cookie, hey?!
I’m now at a point where so much of “me” has gone, I haven’t even realized it. I was too busy fighting. I think of the beautiful human beings we are, always putting up resistance. It’s who we are and what we do but I must say I’m getting better at surrendering. My fight time is a lot shorter; instead of 3 mins in the ring, I think I’m now sitting at 1 min 30?! I know that bell rings a lot sooner!
So now each day, as I breathe in and “let go” and the Wave washes away the old, I know I’m definitely in a process and feeling I’ve got a way to go, that I don’t have all the answers………. and that we’re not supposed to. It’s a journey, a new path to walk and discover; the colours and the smells are different and the oxygen I breathe is most definitely more vibrant.
So what do I do? I open up my heart and I breathe it all in! This is the new way, the New Earth……….. and more importantly the New Me! I’ll keep you posted on the design of my new home. Hmmmmm, I’m thinking something like a Beverly Hills mansion instead of the one bedroom apartment I’ve insisted in residing in for the past million life times! lol!
If you missed Linda Dillon’s June 8th Livestream with Mother Mary & Gaia you can Register here! to watch and receive the atunements and downloads as often as you wish.
Maybe you have you had an experience that you would like to share? Add to this gathering of feedback from our community by going here: http://counciloflove.com/tsunami-of-love-contact-form/
For more experiences, see the Council of Love website, the Tsunami experiences page:http://counciloflove.com/category/tsunami-of-love/tsunami-experiences/.